Wtf? DAMN HICKS!

I went a-bento-ing not all that long ago, and I’m sitting up by the courthouse where you’ll find the only benches in town, eating my rice and little shrimp when what to my wondering eyes should appear but a pregnant slut-ho with a can full of beer. Now, if you wanna retard your kids in the womb, that’s your business, I mean that’s how the bible belt got so damned sophisitcated, is it not? But don’t drag me into a drama because fuck me I don’t wanna talk to you.

But apparently Hick Chick wanted to talk to moi because she starts harassing me, with her fucking kid’s hand in one hand, her can of beer in the other and a gin-soaked baby in her stomach. Why does she harass me? Because I’m wearing a necklace. I SHIT YOU NOT.

She’d heard this rumour that my sister and I are witches, which is entirely based on the fact that we like to wear black and grey and we come from another state, so it’s so obiviously true. But back to my marvellous story. I’m wearing a little silver dragonfly pendant with a purple quartz (i think) crystal, but from afar off all she could see was that it was a necklace or so I suppose since she walked up to me using every swear and insult her perfectly smooth brain could muster only to get within five feet of me and realize that I WAS NOT wearing a penticle, which is what she thought it was.

After seeing her mistake, did she apologize or just suck it up and leave? Noooo, she started dissing my oh-so-loverly, costs more than her entire outfit loose socks that I had to search for and order from Japan and don’t think I didn’t bitch at her for it. I dress how I wanna dress, how I wanna dress, how I wanna dress and I don’t follow her ass around and tell her that she’s 30 pounds too heavy in the ass to do the trashy exposed-thong look, or tell her that her roots are showing down to her fucking ears or, maybe that drinking while she’s pregnant is going to end her kid up in this exact conversation with someone who reads one day. If you’re just now getting that I’m inappropriately stuck up, then you’re new here, lol.]]>

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