Review: One Missed Call (08)

Well, it’s official, the remake of One Missed Call was actually worse than I thought it would be. They added a…and then there was the…and he was a cop but…have you ever wanted to be able to shoot just the piece of your brain out that controls the memory of one single film? Spoilers Below

First of all, someone start punching that main chick – just, please. Punching. Because she was worthless through the entire thing, and where as I loved Yumi and wanted her to make it, this new chick actually made me root for the ghost! Yes, that’s right, I wanted them to get her and kill the shit out of her.

Plus, they promised me Azura Skye and she was only it in for, like, 10 minutes! Plus, there are so many inconsitancies between the films it makes the remake look like a 100 monkeys wrote it with their feet. Somehow Newmi ( which is what I call the main character, since she’s New Yumi ) happens to be everywhere the ghosts are – in places she wasn’t in the first film – poking her ass into the crime scenes and then, to convince us that she’s terrified, she begins acting like she just swallowed a bug. She went to the Meg Ryan School for Acting Good, or something. She makes Anne Hathaway look like Judy Denche in comparison. ( I know what you’re thinking, how can I possibly be Judy Denche when I’m so obviously Halle Barry – okay, I’m done, lol. )

On top of this, they added BS that didn’t need to be in there – like the multitude of ghosts out of nowhere. Just random smack-faced ghosts with dead, blue skin and meanacing faces just staring at you if you’ve gotten the call – and then it turns out that *fanfare* those ghosts are actually exact replicas of the little ghost girl’s toys! Plus, there’s nothing left of the original film to make this scary – they kept a very few things, and didn’t really think about what they were doing. This movie is SO bad, it gets a negative rating – three thumbs up my butt. Do yourself a favor, watch the original.

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